love money party

"this trout has a lot of skin, fins, and bones.  it is very hard to eat, just thought you should know." - a customer at my restaurant, who probably shouldn't have ordered fish

ella

ella

ella

eh.

"haile selassie"

this fucked up thing happened when i was in florida for the holidays. 

i'm driving to the mall in my dad's new prius.  my best friend from childhood is in the front seat.  he's cool--he went to school in a city and has a top-bun. we're arriving fashionably late to an annual gathering of our high-school-friend-group that always happens around christmas time at carabbas.  we always used to go to the carrabbas in the nice part of town where our parents live.  but now that the few of them who live where we grew up have their own apartments, we eat out by them;  it is a carrabbas that is not in the nicest part of town.

we learn when we get to the host stand inside that we are not fashionably late, but are the first to arrive. the four women who we are meeting always took longer to get ready than we did, he and i remark.

but something happens before we make it in to the host stand.  i park my dad's prius in the parking lot outside the carrabbas, and we begin to walk up the sidewalk to the front door.  in a classically italian tradition, there are southern-inspired wicker rocking chairs situated next to free-standing ash trays outside the restaurant on a wrap-around porch.  we walk by a middle aged couple who are both rocking a chair and nursing a drink.  one laughs to other and points to my friend. 'look at his hair!'  the other responds with equally joyous disbelief.  they cackle loudly and mockingly ask my friend question my friend as we walk by.  i watched 'dumbo' every day of my young life, and the experience of witnessing my best friend get laughed at by two drunk people outside of a carrabbas that is not in the nicest part of town was was devastating.

we continued walking the ten or so feet into the restaurant.  we sat on a bench inside and collected ourselves.  first we sat, then he got up as if he were going to go out and say something.  but i could tell that wasn't what he wanted to do, so i told him he shouldn't.  he sat down without hesitation.  then i thought about whether or not i should go out and say something.  then i questioned why my response to their behavior while we were still outside was to say 'that is not nice.' then i started to question a lot of things about myself.  then he started to talk and i listened.

then we went up to the host stand and found out that we were the first to arrive.

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the manager of the small specialty foods store by my house referred to me as 'a regular' and my heart grew three sizes!